“My husband texted from vegas: ‘just married my coworker. You’re pathetic BTW.’ I replied: ‘cool.’ Then I blocked his cards and changed the house locks. Next morning, police were at my door…”

The company’s no-fraternization policy, ignored so casually in the glow of their affair, turned out to be very real when someone finally had reason to enforce it. Both Ethan and Rebecca were fired within a week. Apparently “spontaneous Vegas marriage to your married coworker after eight months of deception and financial misuse” is not the sort of risk profile most employers enjoy carrying.

Ethan moved back into Margaret’s house.

Lily posted increasingly vague messages about toxic family members and spiritual warfare.

Margaret screamed at a Starbucks barista who vaguely resembled me and got herself banned from the location near their subdivision.

Sarah tried to threaten Ethan with emotional damages on behalf of Rebecca and got laughed out of the first lawyer’s office she called.

The entire clan crumbled like wet paper.

Meanwhile, my own life finally exhaled.