The house sat above the water on the La Jolla cliffs, white exterior, cedar roof, long bands of glass facing west, a wraparound terrace wide enough for real outdoor dinners instead of decorative furniture no one ever used. Six bedrooms. A pale stone kitchen with brass fixtures. A stairway that curved gently enough to look expensive without trying. At sunset the Pacific turned silver and then lavender and then a dark blue so saturated it almost looked invented. If I had designed a home at seventeen, just after my mother died and I began learning what it felt like to lose a place emotionally before you lost it physically, I probably would have built some impossible fantasy with turrets and drama and too many fireplaces. At thirty-four, I wanted something different. Quiet. Light. Space. The feeling of opening a door and not having to explain myself to anyone standing on the other side.
Every dollar that bought that house was mine.